Spring is here! Surrounded by nature’s beauty, I’ve been thinking a lot about self-care and how that creates SUSTAINABLE resistance!
Part of what makes the Pussyhat Project a success is that it embraces fun and pleasure and joy. It’s fun to put on a hat, it’s a pleasure to give hats away, it was a joy to see the huge “flag of resistance” we created on January 21. Pleasure does not impede progress, it fuels it!
What do you do to take a break now and then? Have you ever noticed that when you feel the most bonkers busy and it seems like you couldn’t POSSIBLY stop to take a break, that’s actually THE time to take a minute and breathe?
Last night my eyes were glued to my laptop doing Something Important That I Don’t Remember Now. I was thirsty for water, and I had a huge headache from being at the computer nonstop. I couldn’t possibly stop for a break. Then, Hallelujah! my angel friend Yumi Sakugawa called and asked if she could come over. We ordered in food (local favorite Park’s Finest), I finally drank some water, and at the end of the night, we took a lovely walk to Grand Park and sat on a marble bench in front of City Hall. Being under the night sky, I could feel myself release the anxiety I had been hanging onto. It was bliss.
My friend Yumi just released her 4th book, and it covers all sorts of tips on how to stay sane and how to implement self-care. It’s called The Little Book of Life Hacks, and it’s a gorgeous book that Yumi fully illustrated with her amazing iconic drawings. If you want a copy, in the spirit of The Pussyhat Project, she has given me 3 copies to give away to my mailing list! If you would like one of these gorgeous books, please email me back at email@example.com with Subject Heading “I care about me” Include your mailing address and I will randomly choose 3 winners on Wednesday night!
You can find me this month in LA, though I will be traveling all over this summer to visit YOU! More on that epic road trip very soon!
May 9: UCLA 7:00pm – Women of Color: A Discussion on Intersectional Feminism – I am on an awesome panel!
May 10: Skylight Books 7:30pm – I interview Yumi about her new book! Yumi also illustrated a limited edition print of PUSSYHATS in her eponymous style. A detail of that is below (and you can see us holding it in the first photo above). It’s so amazing. There are only 100 of them available, and you get first dibs if you go to this event. She and I will both sign the print at the event.
Um also… I have to vent about my pet peeve that I try to avoid. It’s a bad habit I have and maybe you do too. It boils down to this: There is a difference between self-care and self-help. Self-help is important. It’s when you are down and out and need to build yourself back up, often through pleasure and pampering and joy. A lot of women are told that we need to be better about this. And we are getting better at it. The NEXT step though, is giving ourselves pleasure and pampering and joy EVEN WHEN we are NOT down and out. Even if we’re just fine. Because notice, if you only give yourself pleasure and pampering and joy when you’re down and out… what are you teaching yourself? That you only get pleasure and pampering and joy when you’re down. So to get pleasure and pampering and joy (let’s called it PPJ for now)… you get yourself down in order to receive PPJ. We need to be administering PPJ even when we’re UP. Because that is the only way we will RISE.
When you give yourself pleasure and pampering and joy, EVEN WHEN you don’t “need” it – that is not just self-help, that is TRUE self-care! For example, I’m feeling pretty great right now… and I don’t NEED pleasure and pampering and joy… but I’m going to give myself some anyway! YAY!
So if you’re down and out, I’m sending you love.
If you’re feeling a-okay, I’m sending you love.
And if you’re feeling FAAAAABULOUS, I’m sending you love.
Lots of love,
P.S. I am slowly but surely going through all your letters sent to firstname.lastname@example.org and through my website. Thank you so much for your kind words and amazing uplifting energy!
P.P.S. Is it scary to say out loud, “I care about me”? Practice it. Seriously. It’s OK, it’s GREAT to care about yourself. It’s not selfish. Women especially have been taught that caring for ourselves is a bad thing (this is the work of patriarchy, am I right?!). In the words of Maya Angelou, “I am a feminist. I’ve been female for a long time now. I’d be stupid not to be on my own side.” Say it! I care about me.